1. Can You Be Your Own Hero?

Hi, I’m Natalie Ottosen and you’re listening to The Mindset School podcast, episode number one.

Welcome to The Mindset School podcast, a show for spiritual entrepreneurs who are ready to stop feeling stuck, reconnect to their soul’s purpose, and create a deeply fulfilling life and business. I’m Natalie Ottosen, transformational life coach, and reconnection healing foundational practitioner, and I can help you scale and grow a six-figure business from a place of inner authority, wisdom, knowledge, and truth.

If you are a spiritual entrepreneur and you are looking to take that first step towards your dream of running your own business, this is the show for you. Ready to step into your power and move forward with clarity and purpose? Let’s go.

Hello, beautiful soul family and welcome to the very first episode of The Mindset School. I am so excited to be launching this podcast so that I can come here every week and share tips and tricks and advice that will give you the tools and the skills that you need in order to take your life and spiritual business to the next level. I want to jump right in.

Did you know that you can become your own hero? You might have just cringed a little bit or you might have even rolled your eyes, but bear with me, hear me out. Listen, 15 years ago I was not my own hero, and I wasn't even my own friend. And maybe possibly you may be feeling many of these same feelings right now. You might be feeling fear, fear of failure, fear of rejection or even judgment. That fear that might be leading to feeling stuck in procrastination which is leading to missed opportunities for you and possibly regret.

Maybe you’re indulging in self-sabotage and engaging in self-destructive behavior. That can show up like drinking too much or overeating or even spending too much time on social media or Netflix. Maybe you lack motivation especially when it comes to your goals and dreams, like possibly building that spiritual business you've always wanted or starting that podcast that you've always wanted. You also may be thinking, I've done this mindset thing before, it doesn't work.

I did have somebody say that to me recently and I’ll talk a little bit more about that in a minute, but you also might be struggling with perfectionism which comes from fear. Because if you or the thing that you're working on is perfect, no one can judge you, no one can reject you. You’re constantly striving to be this perfect human and creating unrealistic expectations for yourself which is just leading to more feelings of overwhelm and stress. And the last thing we need more of is overwhelm and stress.

I like to compare this to a house. I am sure most of you live in a home or if you've ever built a home you'll really understand this. Think about the building process. The first thing they ever do in building a home is, they dig the hole to pour the foundation. After you pour the foundation you put down the subfloor, then you frame the house. After that you add the roof. And they say the roof is the most important thing because then you can do everything else after that. So it’s always downhill from there, flies from there. So then you add windows, electrical, plumbing, sheetrock, flooring, fixtures, paint etc.

That foundation is an absolute necessity because without it you can’t put down the subfloor, you can’t start building walls, you can't add the roof and you can't move forward in the building process. That process is so important. It requires multiple thorough inspections. And without that, that house, it can never become a home. The same is true for our mindset. We have to first recognize that we’re even having negative thoughts or thoughts in general.

So many of us don't even recognize that some of our main thoughts are negative thoughts. And that those thoughts are creating the results in our lives. Then we have to learn how to challenge and start shifting the negative self-talk and practicing positivity through things like mindfulness, gratitude, meditation and even self-reflection. So that we are able to even believe we are capable of creating new results or outcomes in our lives. So, again without the foundation we lack the proper support to build the life that we are truly trying to create.

So you might be asking, “Well, how do I know I need to work on my mindset?” So some of the questions you can start asking yourself are, do you often find yourself thinking negatively or feeling stuck in negative thought patterns? Do you struggle with self-doubt and lack of confidence? Do you struggle with setting and achieving goals? Do you find yourself making excuses or blaming others for your problems? Do you struggle with adapting to change or facing new challenges? Do you often feel overwhelmed or stressed even when the situation doesn't seem that difficult?

I have a really good example of this. So I was going to Miami for Work Hard, Play Hard with my mentor. And one of my dogs went to the bathroom, as I was packing one of them went to the bathroom in my room. I freaked out because I was so stressed and overwhelmed already, I absolutely made a mountain out of a molehill. And then normally I would have judged myself for overreacting. So the mindset thing that I mentioned above about mindset doesn't work, it's not a one and done. And it’s something that you have to work on every single day.

The other thing is, do you have trouble staying motivated or finding meaning in your work or daily activities? So if you answered yes to any of these questions, it may be worth exploring ways to improve your mindset because improving your mindset, it can make you more positive, it can make you more adaptable and resilient which ultimately improves your overall wellbeing. So what does any of this have to do with being your own hero? What does that even mean? Becoming your own hero is learning how to manage this beautiful mind of yours, this beautiful human mind of yours.

Learning how to take control of your life, finding your inner strength and confidence and then being able to actively work towards your goals, your dreams, and your aspirations. Last year I did a four month intensive training called bioenergetic healing. And I did this with a large group of beautiful women. So every month we would have this therapist who leads these intensive two, three day workshops. He would come in and do these really powerful exercises with us. On this particular exercise he had asked us to name our three heroes dead or alive and their three attributes.

So these kinds of exercises can be quite frustrating for me, but the first person that I thought of was myself. Also I figured that he didn't want me to name myself, but he wanted me to name three people. So, struggling I eventually found my three. Then he went around the room and each of us shared and we wrote down all of these attributes on a large piece of paper. When it was my turn to share I told him that I had named myself first and foremost, but I was sure that he didn't want me to do that.

So I found three additional people, but I did also tell him how frustrating this exercise was for me because I didn't really have anyone to depend on in my life, no one did it for me. I had to do and figure out most of the things on my own. You know that quote, Mel Robbins says, “No one's coming to save you?” That was me, that was my experience. I had to take responsibility for my own actions. I had to find my own strength and courage. I had to do a lot of work to become who I am today to find my inner wisdom, to find my truth and to be able to move forward in my own life in a positive way.

He was kind of taken back and then shared that in his 20 years of experience and I'm sure thousands of hours in training and seminars and workshops. He had never had somebody name themselves as their own hero. As a coach who already works with women who struggle with mindset and feeling worthy, I knew in that moment that was my mission, that was my purpose.

And I also felt so proud that despite everything that I had been through in my own life, all of the perceived failures and mistakes, of my parents getting divorced and being physically and sexually abused. And being a young teen mom and going through my own personal divorce, being a single parent, going through an adoption, struggling with loss of loved ones, struggling with my own body image and body dysmorphia. And then having major health complications that I went through personally and the people I love the most.

I have become the person I'm most proud of because I have fought like hell to become her. So why am I telling you all of this? Because I know how you feel. I have been where you are because like you might be feeling, I struggled with the fear, the procrastination, the lack of motivation. I was self-sabotaging all the time. And I was really stuck in perfectionism. All of this made me feel so alone, stuck, disconnected, unsure about my path and purpose even though I knew I had one. I was giving all of my power away.

And I was desperately seeking connection with myself first and foremost and other people, but especially women, women who were going through the same thing that I was going through. And I'm also telling you this because you too can learn the tools and the skills just like I did, to help you move forward, so that you can become the hero of your own story. And I want to share with you how I did this.

It started by doing the foundational work of mindset, mindfulness, and meditation. Obviously, I've talked about mindset today. And I’ll talk about mindfulness and meditation in the upcoming episodes. But here are a few things that you can start doing today on your own journey. First, listen to this podcast. I will be sharing so much value in actionable steps every single week on how you can start shifting your own mindset.

Next is you can start practicing gratitude. Start by just writing out one thing that you’re grateful for every single day. And I’m going to challenge you, make yourself accountable. Post it on your Instagram story and feel free to tag me @soulsistercoaching and I’ll share it.

Next, start to reframe your negative thoughts. When negative thoughts arise try to reframe them into a more positive light. For example, instead of saying, “I can't do this.” Try saying, “I can learn how to do this with practice.” It starts with those simple little shifts. And if you're struggling with this, again reach out to me @soulsistercoaching on Instagram. And I’ll give you some more ideas on how to do this. Start to pay attention, focus on what you can control instead of worrying about the things that are beyond your control. Focus on what you can control and take action towards your goals today. A little reminder, other people's behavior are out of your control.

Next, set realistic goals. So set goals that are achievable and realistic and break them down into smaller manageable goals for yourself. Make sure that you’re practicing self-care. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually by getting enough sleep, by eating healthy foods, by exercising regularly or even just moving your body daily and then engaging in activities that bring you joy. Surround yourself with positivity. Surround yourself with people who support and encourage you. Consume media that uplifts and inspires you.

It's one of the reasons I created Soul Sister Coaching. I wanted to be able to create a space where you can be inspired daily because it's not just who we surround ourselves with and what we put in our bodies. It's also what we feed our brain. What you put in your mind matters.

And lastly, practice mindfulness. So take time each and every day to start creating a mindfulness practice such as meditation, deep breathing exercises or simply just being present in the moment. One of my favorite things for being present is going out and sitting at my pond.

So I'll be diving a little bit deeper into mindfulness in the next podcast episode, but for now, remember that improving your mindset is an ongoing process and it requires effort and commitment every single day. But even small changes can have a significant impact on your overall wellbeing. So if I asked you to name your heroes, would you name yourself? I would absolutely love to know. Send me a message on Instagram @soulsistercoaching and let me know. I’ll see you next week, all my love.

To celebrate the launch of the show I’m going to be giving away my favorite books, journals, planners, energy healing sessions, binaural meditation packs, coaching packages and so much more. I’m going to be giving away 100 prizes for 100 reviews to the lucky listeners who follow, rate, and review the show.

It doesn't have to be a five-star review although I sure hope you love the show. I want your honest feedback so I can create an amazing show that provides tons of value. Visit soulsistercoaching.com/podcastlaunch to learn more about the contest and how to enter. I’ll be announcing the winners on the show in an upcoming episode.

Thank you for joining me for this week's episode of The Mindset School. Ready to dive deeper into finding your purpose and create a deeply fulfilling life? Visit soulsistercoaching.com for more guidance and resources. See you next week.